So apparently I’m a millennial and that’s starting to suck. A recent article pointed to some analysis that indicated that my generation is having less sex. The suggested reason? Smartphones. Or more accurately, technology. Sensible people may ask how it’s even remotely possible for technology to have a negative effect on sex. Sensible people, who are probably having sex right now, may wonder which right minded person would prefer to watch TV, communicate via instant message, lust over ‘perfect’ faces and bodies on the internet, rather than curl up and frolic with a real live person.
I am a sensible person. So to my fellow millennials I pose this question – what the f*ck is wrong with you? The article seems pretty accurate. The internet is providing us with the opportunity to constantly window shop. Even though we’re window shopping from a store many of us can’t afford to ‘purchase’ from, it doesn’t seem to matter. Men and women are ogling the perfection of models and body-builders and lusting after their fine faces and physiques. Meanwhile, the ‘real’ people we encounter on a daily basis, you know, the people who we could actually have a relationship or at least have sex with, are being found, and left, wanting.
In an era when information, science and technology could well facilitate the safest sex we could be having, we’re literally choosing not to have sex because the girl you met in the supermarket, or the guy who tried to chat you up at the gym isn’t as attractive as whoever the hell you’re following on Instagram or seeing on the new TV series you love so much.
The possibilities are nearly endless. Stop judging real people, living real lives against models who are posing for a single shot. We’re legitimately hurting our present and future selves. Anthropologists are now researching the newest demographic of people. Elder orphans are persons who, usually by choice, are now over a certain age and have no immediate family members. These persons are being advised to take steps to avoid what appear to be the inevitable ill effects of being alone for too long. How did this become a choice? When did our interactions become so flawed that we’re deciding to forgo coexistence altogether.
So seriously. For the sake of your own health and the continuation of the human race. Turn off the damn TV, unfollow that Instagram account, stop reading (or rather, looking at the pictures) in that magazine or blog, and please, real life sex can’t (always) be like porn – get over it. Look in the mirror. You’re not bad looking at all. You’re actually pretty damn cute. Now get out of the house and go meet some real people. Chat up that coworker, that fellow gym member, the friend of the friend or the coworker who’d maybe caught your eye once upon a while ago. Go do some volunteer work, join a group, hang out with friends on the weekends, do something fun that doesn’t include an electronic device attached to your hands (I’m looking at you ladies, lock those toys away). Go out, meet someone, make a connection, have some sex (but only the really great, really safe sort, please) otherwise T.S. Elliot will be right and the world really won’t end with a bang…
The Happiness Paradigm 
Ummm… yeah… i think you’re intentionally leaving out some context here… “go out and have some sex”? Are you talking about the paid kind? One night stand maybe? Cuz the other kind comes with other things like feelings and responsibility and such…. You know the old adage right? “With great sex comes great responsibility”… I think that’s what it says… it also comes with the possibility of STDs and children! Hurt feelings… Bobbetting as a result…
yeah… so maybe some people waiting on the android to come along 😉 But not one as devious as the one in ex-machina.
In short… without reading your reference article, sex is less cuz maybe relationships have become harder? Or better yet… the people who are not having a lot of sex are the ones who are looking for more than sex maybe? ….
I’m no expert still…
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Well… I made sure to include two references to safe sex – ‘In an era when information, science and technology could well facilitate the safest sex we could be having,…’ and ‘…have some sex (but only the really great, really safe sort, please)’, so I’m in no way implying that people should be careless with sex and expose themselves to the potential unwanted consequences.
There’s also nothing wrong with paying for sex (again if your country or state facilitates that kind of trade it could be deemed safe) and nothing wrong with one night stands per se. If a person has the emotional capacity for that, why not? Also it’s ‘…meet someone, make a connection…’ which may actually lead to a relationship…
But it absolutely should not be that we’re choosing to sequester ourselves in our homes with our electronic devices because relationships are hard.. Work is hard, we get out of bed and go do that though don’t we? Interacting with another human being couldn’t possibly be easy. It’s work but it carries it’s own set of benefits in the short and long terms. The rewards of a relationship may not be monetary or overtly extrinsic but a healthy relationship and in some cases just a really great sexual encounter can have it’s own intrinsic value.
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Sex takes time, whether you are seeking it through a relationship or paying for it. Then you have to dedicate more time to the act itself. That’s too much time for people who are suffering from attention disorders, who are used to 30 second videos and instant gratification. Also, these people are so caught up in themselves, they can’t be bothered with engaging and sharing intimacy with somebody else. Maybe if sex wasn’t (still) a private act, more of them would be having it. They would at least ‘do it for the Vine’ or social media in general. It’s more fun for them to talk the talk, as opposed to walking the walk.
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Exactly. We’ve literally become too lazy and unmotivated to seek pleasure. That’s disturbing. It’s like the people in Wall-e who’ve gotten so used to everything coming to them they’ve literally lost the ability and the capacity to move around on their own. We’ve become slaves to technology. Listen to the news. Populations all over the world are aging because young, healthy people think that building and maintaining a relationship takes too much effort… But they’ll work 18 hour days and poison their bodies with overuse of drugs and alcohol and think they’re living the good life.
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